yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
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