Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
