I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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