Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
