You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Randomize
