the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
