dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I want her autograph on my taint
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Randomize
