When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
