It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
so let's talk penis.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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