Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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