I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
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