So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Randomize
