I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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