Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
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I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
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Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
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