I've blown a few things in my day
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
