So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize