By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
