GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
