i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Randomize
