I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
