I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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