I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize
