Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
