I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
