you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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