Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I have fence marks all over my body
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
