I want to have your abortion
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize