Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Randomize
