I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
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