Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(949): View more from California

It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.

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(773): View more from Illinois

If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.

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(541): View more from Oregon

I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.

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(318): View more from Louisiana

Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza

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(410): View more from Maryland

It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame

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(613): View more from Ontario

I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first

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(908): View more from New Jersey

I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night

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