I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
He shit in the fireplace
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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