His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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