You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
