I heard we made out
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
