Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
