So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.