i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
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