I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
