Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
