Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
