The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
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