haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
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