I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
She bit a glass in half.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
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