Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
