Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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