so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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