The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
