The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I currently don't understand fingers.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
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