peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
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