Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
zippers are such a cool invention
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Randomize
