Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
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